July 19, 2011

Okay the time is running short. I have just 1 day before my surgery. I meet with Dr. Baker tomorrow at 3:00 and we will go over the final things. I hope the Mercy Systems were able to get the stuff faxed to him today.

I am wondering how much I am going to lose in this surgery. I am already below my goal weight and have been told to gain weight. So we will see how much more I have to gain. Last time I weighed it was at 170. I have a hard time wrapping my head around that sometimes I mean going from 442 to 170. That is just crazy.

I hope the same problems I had last time don't surface this time but I have faith that Dr. Baker knows what he is doing to prevent it from happening. I am guessing he will immediately put me on home health. But we will see. I will be going out to Mom and Dad's for awhile to make sure the same problems that happened last time don't happen again.

So I am a bit nervous I mean isn't everyone going into surgery but I have confidence in my doctor and I have confidence in God that it will all work out in the end.

July 2 2011

I am in a weird situation I actually have to gain weight. When I weighed on Thursday my weight according to the BMI was right in the normal range. I am no longer overweight, obese, or morbidly obese.

I have been told that I actually need to gain a few pounds. I can't remember a time in my life I have ever had to gain weight. So I have been trying to eat even though I'm not hungry. Today I did get hungry a couple of times so I ate. I grilled fajitas and that was good. Tomorrow I am going to grill steak and onions. Can you tell I just got a grill LOL? I spent my fun money on it. I have been drooling on the smells coming from my neighbor's grill all spring/summer so finally gave in and bought one.

So here's hoping having a grill and having fun things to grill on it will help me gain weight.

April 8, 2011

I know I haven't been blogging a lot lately and I am sorry for that. Life just gets in the way sometimes.

Since the last time I blogged I have gone under 200lbs and am now 8lbs until goal. My goal is 180.

I used to be a 6x and am now a size 12. The first time I tried on the 12's and they fit I almost cried. I don't remember the last time wore a size 12. Maybe elementary school.

I have always been the fat one in the family and am trying to wrap my mind around the fact that isn't me anymore. I look at old pictures of myself and wonder why did I let myself get that bad? Why didn't someone step in earlier? Then I think, people did try I was just the rebellious teen that was too pigheaded to listen. I have no one to blame but myself. No one forced that twinkie down my throat or said you must eat this Whopper or something bad is going to happen. I did it willingly. I am coming to grips with my food addiction but am taking baby steps.

January 30 2011

It has been awhile since I updated my blog so thought tonight might as well be the night.

Weight loss is still doing pretty good. I find myself going up and down a little depending on what time of the month it is. When it is time for my monthly I tend to gain about 2-3lbs but the next week lose it again. So it is a roller coaster.

My incision isn't healed yet so I have been referred to the wound care center and they are trying a few things to get it to heal so I hope it is healed by the time I go see Dr. Baker in April so we can talk about my next surgery to get rid of my muffin top. I am a bit scared about having another surgery considering what happened with the last one. But I know what to do and what not to do so hopefully I won't have the same complications. I have confidence in the doctor at the wound care center I think he knows what he is doing.

October 25, 2010

It is official I am healed enough to go home. Home health was here today and dismissed me from their care. I still have a couple of little sores that are open but nothing major enough for them to continue to treat me. The original wound is healed.

Tomorrow I will start the process of going home. I will take as much stuff as my car will take and then on Wednesday when my mom comes into town she will bring the rest. Tyger will stay out here until after my mom's surgery just in case she needs me. No need to uproot him twice. I don't think she will need me but you never know. Her surgery is November 3. It should be outpatient but they may keep her but we aren't anticipating that.

So I am excited that I get to go home. It will be nice to be in my own surroundings. Don't get me wrong it has been nice being here but I like living on my own.

October 5 2010

I am so tired of being sick all the time. I was doing so good healthwise and then I started to get sick again. I can only blame myself but it is maddening just the same. I bought some Cupcake Pebbles cereal after reading the label and thinking it was safe because there were no offending ingredients but have still been very sick ever since eating it and I have been eating it a lot because it tastes very good. Of course it tastes good it is a kids cereal. I emailed the company to see if their cereals are gluten free and they told me no none of their cereals are gluten free. Why am I stuck with bland cereal or expensive cereal?

Why can't I be creative in what I eat like a normal person? Why do I have to stick with the same foods over and over? I hate being gluten intolerant.

Sept. 17, 2010

Ok, I saw Dr. Baker today and although I knew I was going to gain weight I still didn't like it. I gained 7 pounds and plan on taking it back off by the time I see him in November. I am hoping that by the time I see him I will be close if not there to my goal of being below 200 pounds but I am cautiously optomistic. I will just have to be more diligent in my way of eating and when I get hungry instead of reaching for chocolate reach for celery. I do have my tootsie pops which help also with the sweet tooth cravings and they aren't too high calorie and are individually wrapped and take awhile to eat. He did remind me today that I am to be eating fat free cheese and I guess that would mean fat free mayo too. I may try fat free cream cheese in my lettuce wraps instead as that isn't so bad caloriewise. He also reminded me that I am not to be drinking with my meals 30 minutes before and 1 hour after. That is going to be a hard one to break as I get some serious dry mouth. Maybe I suck a mint or something. If it gets to bad I can ask him about that. He was encouraged by the fact that mom and I are going on a walk for the Children's Advocacy Center of Benton County tomorrow. Which means we are getting up really early as registration is at 7:00 and the walk begins at 7:45. So I will work on the things I need to work on and then go from there. I am working on a DVD that I workout on I bought at Vintage Stock with some money mom and dad gave for my birthday and if you do the whole tape you will have walked 4 miles. I am about 2/3 way through it. Now that it has gotten cooler at night I need to go walking on the Bella Vista walking trail but don't want to go alone so need a walking buddy. I have an idea of someone to ask and will ask soon.

So this is it for now.

Jan